There were 28 people killed when a young man entered a Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, CT Friday, December 14th, 2012.  I'm sure you have spent minutes, maybe hours, looking at pictures on Facebook, listening to the news regarding this tragedy, or spent it discussing it with someone you know.  I can't begin to imagine what the people of that town are experiencing right now: pain, mourning, even hatred- and yet they are also meeting together in churches to pray, showing love to one another as victims of lost loved ones, and supporting one another through community.  As I saw on Facebook, many of my friends and family hugged their little ones just a little bit longer that Friday when their children came home from school, or as they kissed them goodnight.  I think everyone in this country is affected at some level emotionally from what happened in Newtown- something most people will remember and something everyone hopes will never happen again. 

This is Victoria Soto. She was 27 and she is being honored for telling the gunman when he entered her classroom that her students were in the gym, when really she had hid them in the classroom closets.  What an amazing thing.  In the moment of sheer terror, hands shaking, heart pounding so loud you can't hear yourself talk, kids panicking, gun shots in the hallway- Victoria slowed down her mind to think clearly, clearly enough to save her students lives, which could have added to the death toll Friday morning.  But instead, selflessly and heroically her life alone was taken, that all her students might live.
      I do not in any way want to diminish the amazing and excellent act this woman did to save her students, or be insensitive to the hurt and pain some are experiencing, but I do want to use it as an illustration, to amplify Jesus as the Perfect Hero.   

     Victoria Soto did the best thing she knew how.  She saved her 1st grade students from a man who was obviously dangerous, and ready to kill.  He was evil- in the eyes of man and in the eyes of God.  What if, after Victoria hid the kids in the closet and after the gunman entered the room, a 6-year old boy opened the closet door and said, "Um, teacher, I can save myself." ?  What would have happened?  We all can say he would have been ruthlessly gunned down, and perhaps would have revealed that there were more children hiding in the closet.   It is obvious to adults that a 6-year old boy could not save himself from an armed, mentally unstable, ready-to-murder, 20 year old.  
     Jesus did the perfect thing.  He went to the cross to save His children from eternal death that is inevitable to all who do not accept His death, forgiveness and love.  Jesus was perfect in the eyes of God.   Many people- too many people, are like the 6-year old boy in my fictitious illustration.  Jesus is the only protection from our death, yet we say to Him, "Um, Jesus, I can save myself."  It crushes my spirit to think of all the human beings in this world that are acting like the little boy!  Friends, strangers, we are helpless in this fallen world!  We can't save ourselves!  Our eternal death is inevitable without Jesus.  He is the only one who can save us, and you can't save yourself!  It's doesn't work that way!   
      In this illustration, Jesus and Victoria are alike- selflessly and heroically dying so that others might live.  Victoria's act of heroism allowed her students to live- but only on this earth.  Eventually this life as we know it will end.  Jesus is unlike Victoria in that He saves so that others may have eternal  life.   He wants to save you- He already selflessly and heroically sacrificed His life so that you might have life.  He just wants you to trust that He is who He is and He will save you from death, if you choose to believe.   The little boy in my illustration didn't believe.  In our adult minds, we understand that there would be no possibility for a 6-year old to save himself from an armed and evil man.  But what went on in his mind?  Maybe he had just watched his favorite cartoon, or read his favorite book that had a hero save the day.  Maybe he thought he could be that hero.  Maybe he wrestles with his dad and thought he could take a guy down who was younger than his father.  A 6-year old mind is innocent,  but it is also naive.  God is almighty.  He knows there is no possibility for us to save ourselves.  But what goes on in our minds?  Many of us are naive.  Unfortunately the naiveness of the 1st graders mind, in my illustration, would have killed him.  Don't let it bring you to your eternal death. 

I hope this illustration was received well and with understanding that in no way do I mean to disrespect the victims or their loved ones by using this tragedy in my illustration to present the gospel.

    I have been reading in the book of Proverbs for my personal time with Jesus.  It's been fairly inconsistent with the busyness of life lately, so today- after I scrubbed down the bathroom- I was anxious to open my Bible and have quiet time.   Today,  I read Proverbs 12, and one verse in particular stood out to me.  Verse 9:

     I think this verse explains the American crisis.  Too many people put on the mask of wealth, success and stability when really they are up to their eyes in debt, have a dysfunctional marriage/family and still feel empty with their Porche, their yacht, their mansion and gated community.  The problem is for those still trying to reach that American Dream, we don't see the debt, the dysfunction or the emptiness always.  It's not like the people have a big yard sign saying, "Can't pay for my car payment this month- but hey, look at my house!"  We just see the mask they wear- and usually, it's a smile, great attire, great parties and the like.  They wear this mask well for the most part- I mean, who would want anyone to know that really, they are just playing the "great man" but really are lacking in the most important areas?  
    The reason this verse hit me, and now, almost brings me to tears, is because this so-called "happiness" is one that I know my heart seeks after in my flesh.  In the Spirit I know the American Dream will never satisfy.  In the Spirit I know that chasing after any thing is meaningless, I know things will leave you still empty.  I know that Jesus can only fill this spot.  Then why, why, do I tend to drift back into the thinking that if I only had...?  If I only lived...?  If I could only...?  
    I do not want to slip into this mindset anymore- it robs me of my joy.  It deceives me into thinking the if only's would bring me true happiness.  If my heart is not full of joy, then it's a heart issue, not a possession, job or location issue.  I don't want the lie of the what-if's to steal my contentment away from the here, from the now.  

     Do any of you struggle with the same thing?  How do you deal with it?  Are there any Scripture references you cling to?  

Join me in prayer:
Jesus, you are my All, but lately I haven't been acting like you are.  Forgive me for trying to find fulfillment in other things.  Fill me with your Spirit, and satisfy my deepest desires. You alone can satisfy.  Thank you Jesus that my idolatry is covered by your grace.  Please help me continue in your will and follow you closely.  Amen.


~Leanne~