That changed about a year ago, and our marriage is so much better. We felt conviction to change the way we were running our home. My husband let me lead for the sake of arguements (my control issues) and I liked leading (my control issues). Also, Joey wasn't spiritually overflowing, so it was challenging for him to lead us. However, when the Lord spoke to us, we both submitted, and my husband has grown so much in the Lord since. No longer do I lead this family- but he does, and a great job at that. No longer do I control this family- by God's guidance and wisdom given, Joey does. No longer am I the spiritual leader- he is and he challenges and encourages me in my faith now! No longer am I in charge of our finances- and he is doing a much better job than I did- money isn't being lost in spending foolishly. No longer am I making the decisions- although I have much to contribute, Joey makes the final decisions. No longer do I have nobody to answer to- although I was fooled into thinking that I didn't have God to answer to. Not that I "answer" to Joey, but he holds me accountable to my growth in Christ and challenges me when I am struggling. I actually like having him to "answer to", I have grown a ton more in Jesus. It's helpful having a husband who constantly challenges me in holiness and who builds me up as a godly woman. This is how God designed marriage to be. If you try to do it any other way, it is not God's best, and it won't be your best. Do you feel like you are always arguing with your spouse? Do you feel like there is always tension? Check your relationship and test it with this Scripture. If you are following this guideline, I can guarantee your marriage will be so much better. By doing this, you are being submissive to God and His plan. Being submissive doesn't mean being a doormat. But it does mean stepping down from the platform and letting the husband lead the family. This means, wives, praying for your husbands in this role. Just as Joey found it challenging at first to take the lead, it may also be that for your husband. This doesn't mean you need to step up again, but continue to be humble and under his authority. Husbands, it might be easier to love your wife like Christ loves the church and gave Himself up for it, if you try to live in an "understanding way" and acknowledge that your wife is the weaker vessel. She needs prayer too- especially if she is at all like me and has control issues. You can't force her to change, but the Holy Spirit can do miracles- let me tell you!! So, pray for her! Take your role as the leader in the home very seriously, your job is not to control her, but lead her- in doing so, you "might sanctify her" that "she might be holy and without blemish". (Ephesians 5:22-33). Which role are you in and which role should be in?
As I have shared many times about my "adorning issues", this chapter refers to it again, and I would like to challenge you to analyze yourself concerning this, just as I have. What is the significance of what is mentioned: braiding of the hair, gold jewelry, the clothing you put on? I don't think God is specifically referring to having braided hair, wearing gold or wearing clothes. I am pretty sure that God wants you to wear clothes- if you disagree and have Scripture to back it up- please, email me! Again, I ask, what are the significances of these things mentioned? How do you think we can apply it today? I am being challenged on this in this season of my life. I never knew it to be a problem. Not that it is a problem now, but I definitely can take steps so that it doesn't become a problem. I find it fascinating (and difficult at times) how deep holiness goes. The closer I get to Jesus, the deeper the more complex holiness becomes, yet it's simple at the same time. It's not a matter of trying to look holy, but rather- allowing the Holy Spirit to cleanse you from the inside out. I encourage you to obey the Spirit at all times, even if it seems extreme. One of my extreme obediences to the Lord, was not to color my hair anymore, this was about 2 years ago. Did I tell you I used to be a hairstylist???? Yeah, this was challenging for me. But the issue wasn't that I colored my hair- coloring your hair is not a sin. The issue was much deeper than that, it was my heart. Even though I took physical measures to obey, the Holy Spirit was working on spiritual measures. Even though the change was seen on the outside, a change was also seen on the inside. I believe not coloring my hair was the first step in a project the Spirit is still doing work on.
How are you "adorned"? Do you care more about what you look on the outside than what you do on the inside? Do you put more time into getting physically ready for the day than your do preparing yourself spiritually for the day? Is the Spirit tugging at your heart about something specific? How are you going to respond?